Contemplation and Dread

Okay. So according to ABC News or something, bloggers are the People of the Year (2004) I jumped on the bandwagon like, yesterday. Whatever. So, today's the last day of our "holidays". No more slacking and shit, since school starts like, tomorrow. Bloody freaking hell. I don't want it to start. Higher level now, Junior College (JC), and like, everything's different.

Back tracking a little to our orientation, I guess I never mentioned my OG (Orientation Group) It's...Ingole! The sub-group, or flick is called Inante! At least for mine. We are red, but I think during the whole damned thing we were like, last. Still, everything's over now, just keep the happy memories lol. Our OGLs were great and nice and cool people (did I mention it already?).

And during those last few days, I realised another thing. That I am hopelessly outclassed. My inferiority complex has been hitting me hard, and I don't like it. Fuck. FUCK!!! Looks like everyone seems to be better than me or something. Am I competitive? Or just paranoid? I don't fucking know. Ahh well...life goes on.

As for today, it was a boring day, but I'd rather slack at home than do stuff anyway. :) Basically I was facing my PC for the whole day, and making myself nauseous by playing the Star Wars: Jedi Knight II: Jedi Outcast demo just a few times. Watched this really weird movie starring Andy Lau in the evening. It was titled "Armageddon", or 《天地雄心》 in Mandarin. It was about some godly stuff, including this guy who had bullet wounds that could heal. I was confused by it. But I believe, somehow, that our destiny is in our hands. We cause the end of our world, not some divine power or something.

And now I'm typing this. What more could I say? I don't know. I plan a lot to put in my blog but somehow not everything comes out. What the hell. Nevertheless, this is me, Jamal, Jala, the otaku, or whatever, signing off. Till the next time!

EDIT at 2306 hrs: I just heard the news on radio. The memory returns to me. I forgot to observe the minute of silence at 1800 hours this afternoon for the tsunami victims! I feel so guilty. Don't know why, but I am guilty. I thought the SCDF (Singapore Civil Defence Force) would sound the siren, but instead I heard a bell. Clueless me didn't know what was happening. I did say a short prayer at 1820 hours, but perhaps the effort was half-hearted.

Now I feel real guilty. But I hope that the souls of those who lost their lives in that tragedy find peace in the afterlife. We, the living, will continue and rebuild. God bless us all, the dead and the living.

P.S. I hope I did not offend anybody with this last bit. If I do, I apologise in advance.